It almost a year...i still can remember the incident very clearly....i stated it as 'incident' because it really do ^^ i felt relieving because i'm going to leave to another place ...i have a new circumstance to handle so i have no time for it again and again...after the times in Australia , it will be better person for my dear one...if i said 100% to my dear , its really a lie..so i never said so...i feel bad to have the thought but everything will be fine because i'm leaving....i hate myself damn much for hoping much...maybe i'm like 'easy going' stuff to him right now...but i dont care cause i have an angel beside me now^^i still able to see the scar from the wounded area...i could remember how i felt before this...my angel comes to me right now...enlighten my life and bring me up as who am i...of course i have to thank him too ...for making me tough as i am and half to my dream...it is not about blaming...it was just a test from the god for me^^because i'm not a LAME person...i'm not a glass anymore...and yet havent upgraded to become iron...maybe just a concrete wall...and thanks i'm not that dumb to get suicided though it was going to ...my angel gave me another life...i'm appreciate the time with my dear right now...hope in the reality also having the phrase 'forever happy ever' as in cartoon's. ^^
Perhaps I had been a Christmas ‘present’ to for you to colour up your Christmas celebration…
Because I really don’t understand why…..i have shouted everything out today…everybody will knowing the story soon or later..i felt relieve rite now to shout out everything about you…
Hope i would manage to celebrate Christmas again...and the memories wont flash back...sometimes i felt weird to have all my ex around me^^ it is so weird....but sooner or later i'll be free of the 'back'...
Wish me luck^^
I'll prove to you , and you will regret by dumping me alone from heaven to hell without a single reason which made me to the hell gate
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